I paint to see what it looks like to allow the mind to wander. That doesn’t mean I’m floundering around aimlessly. It’s a purposeful attempt to surrender a few moments hoping to gain some relief from my nagging brain and an overwhelming physical world. This proves to be a constant struggle. On one hand, I desperately seek to articulate a response to the tangible world; society, family, work, culture, etc. Meanwhile, another part of me seeks to obliterate what I think I know and start from scratch. The quest for a clean slate is motivation in the beginning. I’m excited and inspired by a sterile white canvas because it pretends to be a new beginning. Yet another desperate attempt at reinvention. But, of course, my baggage follows me wherever I go. So, what starts out as playful banter between surface, medium, and artist steadily grows into an internal war between creation and destruction. The playful exploration that initiates the process is illustrated through a colorful palette and experimental techniques to move paint around the surface. The frustration of being unsuccessful at my attempt to escape my own thoughts builds as paint is flung with increasingly wild and impulsive fluidity. Once the tantrum subsides I try to mend the chaos with controlled lines and recognizable features. The tension between chaos and control is soothed by geometric shapes and lines that are planned and purposeful, but still appear delicate and vulnerable threatening to become tangled at any moment.